tired-i need a hug-now

I feel so tired. And all I want is a hug. Someone to comfort me by talking or maybe not talk at all. I don't really mind. As long as I'm not alone to deal with this uncomfortable feelings.

I need someone to hug me, kiss my forehead and tell me everything is going to be ok. Hold my hands and whisper to my ears that I will someday become the best that I can be. I need someone to be by my side when I open my eyes in the morning and smile at me. Looking forward to spend each day together... Smiling, laughing and even fight once in a while.

Btw, I found this song in my iPod. I can't even remember when I download it. I love it! And it has nothing to do with what happen to me. I've moved on remember? :) Enjoy it!

i want more! i need more!

I definitely need more time! I need more time to study! 6 weeks until my next exam!

I need more patience! Definitely at work. But I'm loving my job each day. I just need more patience.

I need to control myself. Please do not turn into the emotional-sensitive-angry-fairy-most-of-the-time. I hate it whenever I become too sensitive on small issues. Especially when there's absolutely nothing to sulk! It's driving me nuts!!!

p/s: please bear with ME for now...

my long weekend!

How was your loooooong weekend? Good Friday+Weekend+Easter hols=GREAT FUN! :)

I spend my Good Friday lazying in my room until 4pm! Haha... Then I went out and have lunch/dinner with Akma, Tasha and Marwan. Gossips and more gossips! :)

The Saturday road trip was cancel last minute due to expensive car rentals. But myself, Suria and Mex decided to have fun our own way. Haha.. We took the RailTours to Wicklow-Avoca-BallyKissAngel-Glendalough. The weather was perfect! The scenery is breath taking. We really enjoyed the half-day tour.



On Easter Sunday, I had BBQ potluck with few close friends. It's been a while since I last hang out with them. It was really fun. We ate BBQ chicken/lamb/burger/sausages. Suria cook delicious Carbonara and Mex bought the charcoal (totally forgot to buy extras!). Tasha and Akma made the best fruit cocktails (yummylicious!). And thanks to Marya and Gogon for the drinks. Next potluck will be at Kings Court eh? Heheheheee.... More pics in FB!





I'm so happy that this week starts on Tuesday. No Monday blues. But I'll probbaly have Black Tuesday tomorrow. Hahaa... I'm suppose to be in bed right now. But I slept from 6 to 10pm just now. And I'm wide awake with nothing to do. I guess I'll make the phone call to that someone before I hit my bed and fluffy pillows again.

Thanks to all that contribute to my great fun looooong weekend! To other friends who were not invited, sorry!!! My next potluck will be with you guys :)

random post

Can you imagine living with no water to wash, shower and drink??? That's what my housemates and I are facing right now. Stupid tank which always fail to work at least once a year. Damn you! I'll just have to wait patiently for the plumber to fix it. Hopefully today. I need to do my laundry! No more under garments, no more work cloths, and no more cute sexy pyjamas to wear (I can go naked now... Haha!!!). I guess I'll have to do my laundry at Akma's place 2nite after class.

p/s: FYI, I showered this morning :)

I just realized that I no longer put pics/vids on my post. How boring is my blog? Haha... Even the Paddy's Day vids is still in my digicam!!!

On other random stuff... I wanna go to Paris, Nice and Spain! :) One of my random wish list this year. Hehe...

the truth

I wonder what you told our friend. I should have known what you are gonna tell everyone. That I dump you and I'm always too busy for you. FYI, you dump me! And this is not the first time. Sorry if I have move on and can't take your bullshit anymore. But stop calling our friends and tell them lies. You don't want to be blame, so you blaming me for everything? Oh yeah… I'm the one who's always busy with my work and friends. If I don't work, how the hell am I suppose to survive?!! And friends? I only have few and I barely hang out with them coz I'm always at home waiting for your phone calls or waiting for you to go online (but you never did). I used to stay at home on weekends just to pleased you. Coz I know you don't like the idea of me going out and having fun without you. I never cheated on you and I'm the one who texted you everyday (even though there were no reply at all from you, I keep on texting).

I thought you were the one who's always busy with work? Hang out with friends whenever you got a chance? Even when you got yourself the wireless card, you didn't tell me? I figured it out myself when I saw you online in your room twice. You said you don't wanna tell me stuffs coz you don't want me to worry. And why the hell do you need a girlfriend when you can keep everything to yourself and not share anything with me? It was you who made the decision for both of us. I have no say at all. You dump me whenever you feel like doing it. And you'll call and pretend nothing was wrong everytime. I was stupid enough to just ignore all the things that you said and accept you back again and again. But this time, when I decided enough is enough, you think I dump you.

Hello… Did you forget the text msg you send me at 6 a.m.? I woke up and cried like a crazy girl. Wondering why on earth you did this to me again and again. I cried for 2 days and still no text or phone calls from you. That's when I decided to be strong and move on with my life. I have a good job and lovely friends (who I wish to spend more time with from now on!) and loving family. And when did you realize you were losing me for good? A week and half after that?! I guess it was too late since I already made up my mind. If only you called me earlier, I might forgive you again. But no, it's over this time for good.

So now you are free like a butterfly as you wished.

ms.sleepy head :p

I'm ms.sleepy head. I keep on dozing off at the office!!! Infront of my PC with all the documents buried on my face! Hahahaaa... Work have been very busy (but not right now coz I'm blogging from office! :p).

I feel like typing everything here. But as usual, I stop myself from doing it. I told myself that private stuffs should not be disclose to the world. Enough that my family and close friends knew what's happening in my life.

To those people who hardly knows me, please don't assume you know what's happening in my life. Right now I'm trying to live my life differently. I want to be more adventurous and take bigger risk compared to what I've done before.

I hope this time it is going to work out :)

Thanx to ms.akma dollslavida (again!) and ms.suria for the support. Love you girls so much!

P/S: If you have spare time, watch Once and the OST is superb!

Life is full of surprises!

Yes! Life is full of surprises! :)

*to those people who knows what I mean... haha!*

I'll keep on smiling... :)

My days are filled with happy thoughts and excitement! I love ME now more than ever. I called my parents yesterday, and listening to their voice makes me smile. I really miss them, and they miss me a lot. It's ok mama and ayah. I'm going back for holiday again in Dec! I know it's a long wait but I'm pretty much excited :)

I'm doing great if that's what you want to know. I'm really happy now. Work is busy as always and I like it. It keeps my mind off those negative thoughts. Classes are fun with all the nice friends I have. Not forgetting ms. akma dollslavida who is always here for me! Love u babe!

My weekends were filled with fun (but healthy) activities! No more staying at home, under my duvet for the whole weekend waiting for something miracle to happen! Haha!

Oh yeah.. It was Paddy's Day on 17th March. I went out with my friends to see the parade. It was ok, but not as good as last year. I got to spend more time with my friends and my lovely housemates! Muntaz, Rina and Dila cooked a delicious meal! It was Nasi Hujan Panas, Ayam Masak Merah and Kari Dhal. It was heaven!!!! :D It was the first time in months that I ate 2 plates of rice! 2 plates! Hehehehee...

And I watched Slumdog Millionaire. It is indeed a good movie :) You should watch it.

I guess that's it for now. Until my next post... Take care all!

time to decide?

I'm not sure what you want from me. I thought you made up your mind already? When you told me to forget everything, I cried. I cried really hard and you have no idea how much you hurt me. And now you want to talk?

Once I made up my mind, I won't turn back. Thanks to you, I've been doing a lot of thinking. I think this is not going anywhere. I despise an on/off relationship, which we have been doing for the last couple of months.

I guess it is time to decide and to move on...

get to know me better

Your view on yourself:

You are down-to-earth and people like you because you are so straightforward. You are an efficient problem solver because you will listen to both sides of an argument before making a decision that usually appeals to both parties.

The type of girlfriend/boyfriend you are looking for:

You are not looking merely for a girl/boyfriend - you are looking for your life partner. Perhaps you should be more open-minded about who you spend time with. The person you are looking for might hide their charm under their exterior.

Your readiness to commit to a relationship:

You are ready to commit as soon as you meet the right person. And you believe you will pretty much know as soon as you might that person.

The seriousness of your love:

Your have very sensible tactics when approaching the opposite sex. In many ways people find your straightforwardness attractive, so you will find yourself with plenty of dates.

Your views on education

Education is very important in life. You want to study hard and learn as much as you can.

The right job for you:

You have plenty of dream jobs but have little chance of doing any of them if you don't focus on something in particular. You need to choose something and go for it to be happy and achieve success.

How do you view success:

You are afraid of failure and scared to have a go at the career you would like to have in case you don't succeed. Don't give up when you haven't yet even started! Be courageous.

What are you most afraid of:

You are afraid of things that you cannot control. Sometimes you show your anger to cover up how you feel.

Who is your true self:

You are mature, reasonable, honest and give good advice. People ask for your comments on all sorts of different issues. Sometimes you might find yourself in a dilemma when trapped with a problem, which your heart rather than your head needs to solve.